THE UNISEX, OMNISEXUAL PURITY TEST Version 4.0 (400) University of Southern California 29-Mar-1989 Public domain; no copyright Up with going down. Let there be love. Murphy's law on sex: Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics. Chaste makes waste. Virginity can be cured. NOTICE University Computing Services, University of Southern California, takes no responsibility for this document. It was written entirely on personal time (yeah, right) and con- tains only original and stolen code. The University of Southern California is a conservative and moral campus. The views expressed in this document are those of a shallow few. We are sure UCS and USC are disappointed with the quality and ethical implications of this test. Disclaimer of Liability The user of this test acknowledges, understands, and agrees that sex is a hazardous sport. A person must copulate in control, and use good judgement at all times. A partner's condition varies constantly and is greatly affected by weather changes and previous use. Dirty sheets, variations in terrain and bed surfaces, spouses/pimps/managers, forest growth, rocks and debris, clothed obstacles, and many other natural and man-made obstacles (including other users and customers) exist throughout the bedroom area. Personal man- agers (pimps/spouses) and sado-masochistic operations and equipment are constantly in use and may be hazardous to cus- tomers not copulating in control. Impotence, collisions, and social diseases resulting in injury can happen at any time, even to customers copulating in control with proper sexual equipment. Inherent and other risks are part of the sport and exist in your partner. As a condition of being permitted to use the facilities of your sex object, the user of the partner agrees to copulate in control and within the limits of his or her ability and further acknowledges and accepts these hazards, dangers, and risks and assumes the risk of injury or loss to person or damage to property which might result from the customer's use of the partner's facilities. The Purity Test Version 3.60 Genesis - History Version Year Questions Site Contributors 1 197X 100 MIT unknown 1 1982 100 CMU PS. 2 Spring 1983 247 CMU JB, PD, KR, PS, TS, MT 3 13-Apr 1985 400 CMU DA, FA, TC, NO, DT, SV, RZ 3 05-Sep 1988 400 USC CW 4 29-Mar 1989 400 USC CW, TD Version 1 (100) Created at MIT. Two parallel versions; one for male, and one for female. Not much is known about this version. Version 2 (247) Expanded to 247 questions. This marked the beginning of the unisex versions. The story goes that they intended it to be 250 questions, but got tired that night and said "We'll think of three more tomorrow." Version 3.3C.1 (400) on 05-Dec-1984 First formal release gen- eral of this test, version 3.xx. All former version were short-lived and tended to be bug ridden. Does not dis- criminate against gays or bi's. Good correspondence of scores (especially in the higher score ranges) between this version and version 2. Added in Genesis/History section. Version 3.4 (400) on 29-Jan-1985 Internal version; never re- leased. Source code accidentally destroyed, much to the consternation of one of the authors. Cleaned up many bugs. Added sections: Disclaimer of Liability, Instructions for Use, Scoring, and Warranty Information. Version 3.5 (400) on 10-Apr-1985 Rebuilt from the 3.3C.1 source and the 3.4 (only surviving copy) of the Xerox X9700 laser printer hardcopy. Cleaned up same bugs in 3.4; wiped out a duplicate question; The page number was moved from top of the page to the bottom center; this was to avoid problems trying to coordinate duplex/simplex printing by other people and the positioning of odd/even page numbers. Added in verbose history section. Version 3.5A (400) on 13-Apr-1985 Formatted text was unclear due to a problem with the text-formatting program. Version 3.60 (400) on 05-Sep-1988 Corrected grammatical er- rors and modified the section on scoring to include "Table of Purity." This is the first USC modification of the test. The test was downloaded to a Macintosh II. Version 4.00 (400) on 29-Mar-1989 Corrected more grammar er- rors and finally formatted the test with Microsoft Word. Re- moved the confusing section numbers and replaced them with centered titles. Also removed endnotes and placed defini- tions within test.) The Purity Test Version 3.60 Instructions For Use This is a fairly long test consisting of four hundred (400) questions which become progressively worse, or better, de- pending on your viewpoint. There are many ways of going about taking this test. You can, of course, as your right, guaranteed by the Constitution, be anti-social and sequester yourself in your room and take this test all by yourself; however, we feel that the best way to utilize this test if to hold a Purity Test Party. All you need for a Purity Test Party is one (1) copy of the test, and a bunch of friends. (No doubt lots of writing implements and paper would be use- ful too.) The person with the copy of the test will be the test administrator; he/she will read the questions out loud and everybody else will write down their answers. We have no definite rules as to whether the participants are required to divulge their answers, that is up to the group to decide; however, each person's purity score should be made common knowledge. (The person with the highest score gets to be giggled at for the rest of his/her life.) This works great at parties and lets everybody know who's easy and who isn't, so you'll know who to go home with. Don't leave home without it. You may also use the test for drinking games, such as "I never." The test administrator reads the ques- tions, and players must consume one drink if they answer the question "yes." (By the way, "purity points" will be lost playing this game.) All questions pertain to events that have happened to you subsequent to your weaning and babyhood in- fancy. Anything that may have happened before such time is considered not standing and void; it's a null point. Definitions of Terms Used in The Purity Test Mutual Masturbation: refers to someone masturbating you AND/OR you masturbating someone else, not exclusively someone masturbating you AND you masturbating them. Homosexual Sex: when you and/or your partner (of the same sex) have an orgasm while there is some contact between the genitals of you and those of your partner. Sex: Penetration. Oral and anal sex DO NOT count as sex, un- less you are a practicing homosexual. ALL TECHNICALITIES COUNT The Purity Test Version 3.60 Platonic Relations For this section, if you are mostly a: - heterosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of the opposite gender. - homosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of your own gender. - 50-50 confirmed bisexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of the opposite gender. Have you ever done any of the following: 1. Kissed a friend or stranger on their hand or their head/neck region as a friendly gesture? Yes [ ] No [ ] 2. Held hands with someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 3. Had a date? Yes [ ] No [ ] 4. Had a date past 1 a.m.? Yes [ ] No [ ] 5. Dated someone on a regular basis? Yes [ ] No [ ] 6. Picked someone up? Yes [ ] No [ ] 7. Been picked up? Yes [ ] No [ ] 8. Gone steady? Yes [ ] No [ ] 9. Slow danced? Yes [ ] No [ ] 10. Had the symptoms of Russian (Rushin') fingers? Yes [ ] No [ ] 11. Had the symptoms of Roman (Roamin') hands? Yes [ ] No [ ] 12. Shared a bed, sleeping bag, or sleeping accommodations with someone without anything steamy happening? Yes [ ] No [ ] 13. Given a back or neck rub or massage with no ulterior mo- tive? Yes [ ] No [ ] 14. Used tickling as a pick-up, get-to-know-you-better rou- tine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 15. Directly asked someone whom you were not going out with and had never gone out with if they were a virgin? Yes [ ] No [ ] 16. Used physical strength, physical power, or any physical prowess, or prowesslessness as a factor in pick-up, get-to-know-you-better routine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 17. Secretly lusted after someone without that person know- ing? Yes [ ] No [ ] 18. Dropped subtle hints to someone whom you liked/loved/wanted, hoping that they would pick up on it? Yes [ ] No [ ] Auto-Erotica Although this section is termed Auto-erotica and mono-sexualism, the events herein still count even if you are with someone else at the time. It was so named because pre- dominantly these activities, like the harp, (and the porce- lain goddess) is essentially a solo event. 19. Had an arousing dream? (Wet dreams and the such.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 20. Been sexually aroused? Yes [ ] No [ ] 21. Uttered, muttered, yelled, or screamed (or in other words, verbally expressed) obscenities? Yes [ ] No [ ] 22. Fantasized about your long-term instructor, mentor, or someone who is superior to you? (One day skydiving teachers, or two hour ski instructors and the such do not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 23. Fantasized about your lawyer, doctor, nurse, psychiatrist or someone with whom you are having a professional relation- ship with? Yes [ ] No [ ] 24. Fantasized about someone you know personally but not closely? Yes [ ] No [ ] 25. Fantasized about anyone and masturbated at the same time? Yes [ ] No [ ] 26. Read or bought pornographic periodicals? Yes [ ] No [ ] 27. Read sexually explicit literature? Yes [ ] No [ ] 28. Gone skinny dipping alone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 29. Made obscene phone calls? Yes [ ] No [ ] 30. Called any recorded phone sex numbers? (e.g. (213) 976-BABY, (213) 976-6660, (213) 976-WETT, etc. Please note that these are $2 calls in addition to toll charges and long distance charges.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 31. Called any live phone sex numbers? Yes [ ] No [ ] 32. Stuffed your bra if you are female, or stuffed your pants if you are male? Yes [ ] No [ ] 33. Shaved your genital pubic hair? Yes [ ] No [ ] 34. Shaved your genital pubic hair on a fairly regular basis? Yes [ ] No [ ] 35. Masturbated? Yes [ ] No [ ] 36. Masturbated at least five times in one twenty-four hour period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 37. Masturbated on a fairly regular basis of no less than once a fortnight (14 days)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 38. Masturbated where you could have been discovered? (On a park bench, at a graduation ceremony, in a gym shower, movie theatre, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 39. Masturbated out in the wilds or in nature with no nearby civilization? Yes [ ] No [ ] 40. Masturbated to orgasm? (Does it make sense to merely mas- turbate?) Yes [ ] No [ ] 41. Masturbated while reading either pornographic or sexually explicit materials? (The Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue does not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 42. Masturbated while driving a moving, land vehicle? (Car, RV, truck, motorcycle, hearse, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 43. Masturbated while on the phone? (No kinky interpretations of on the phone. This is legit.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 44. Masturbated while in a bathroom of the opposite sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 45. Masturbated while watching an R or X-rated show? Yes [ ] No [ ] 46. Seen any burlesque show? Yes [ ] No [ ] 47. Been to a peep show? Yes [ ] No [ ] 48. Been to a private showing of a pornographic movie? Yes [ ] No [ ] 49. Seen a pornographic movie in a theater? Yes [ ] No [ ] 50. Walked around in your habitation in the nude? (Must be a serious walk; five minutes of going around trying to find your undies after a shower doesn't make it.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 51. Walked around in a public or semi-public area with a top (shirt, T-shirt, etc) but no bottoms (pants, shorts, etc)? (Dorm hallways, lobby areas, etc. are acceptable; however locker rooms and bathrooms and such place where this behavior is not proscribed does not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 52. Bought blatant sexual objects? (This means that if you buy a bottle of Coke and you use it as a dildo, it really doesn't count. Think: design and function.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 53. Owned any erotic art pieces? (Like that phallic symbol in the cat woman scene in A Clockwork Orange.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 54. Sculpted erotic-obscene artworks in food (predominantly bananas, carrots, apples...)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 55. Eaten any erotic food items? (Chocolate tits, banana dicks, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 56. Sculpted erotic-obscene artworks in soap, wood, or any other carvable material (that isn't food)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 57. Made an X or R-rated snowman or snow-woman? Yes [ ] No [ ] 58. Tasted your own orgasmic liquids? Yes [ ] No [ ] 59. Inserted your finger into your rectum? Yes [ ] No [ ] 60. Used ben-wa balls? They come as a set of two hollow balls, filled with mercury. These balls are inserted into the rectum of one of the participants before sex, and are yanked out, usually by the partner, during orgasm. I think it's sup- posed to feel good or something like that. Yes [ ] No [ ] 61. Performed oral sex on yourself? (Yes, this is possible.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 62. Willingly urinated on the garments that you were wearing at the time? (In other words: piss in your pants; wet yourself; had an accident.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 63. Willingly urinated on any part of your body? Yes [ ] No [ ] 64. Willingly defecated on the garments that you were wearing at the time? (In other words: shit in your pants; had a seri- ous accident.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 65. Willingly defecated on yourself? (In other words: You're sick.) Yes [ ] No [ ] Ethics 66. Administered a whole Purity Test or are in the process of administering a whole Purity Test of any version? Yes [ ] No [ ] 67. Taken Purity Tests of any versions more than 5 times? Yes [ ] No [ ] 68. Lied on any previous Purity Tests? Yes [ ] No [ ] 69. Exaggerated about any sexual experiences? Yes [ ] No [ ] 70. Broken your word, promise, or vow? Yes [ ] No [ ] 71. Written graffiti? Yes [ ] No [ ] 72. Plagiarized? Yes [ ] No [ ] 73. Shoplifted? Yes [ ] No [ ] 74. Stolen? Yes [ ] No [ ] 75. Made out a check that bounced? Yes [ ] No [ ] 76. Committed breaking and entering? Yes [ ] No [ ] 77. Told someone that you loved them when you did not? (This does not include yourself.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 78. Told someone that you loved them strictly because you wanted to have sex with them? (Again, do not include your- self.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 79. Fantasized about someone else other than your partner while you were engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturba- tion? (This definitely does not include yourself.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 80. Intentionally listened to other people having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation without their knowing it? Yes [ ] No [ ] 81. Used alcohol to lower someone else's inhibitions for the intent of sex or oral sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 82. Used drugs to lower someone else's inhibitions for the intent of sex or oral sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 83. Forced or coerced someone into having intimate physical relations with you? Yes [ ] No [ ] 84. Had dates with more than one person in the same night while one or more of the people involved were not aware of your actions? Yes [ ] No [ ] 85. Gone steady with two or more people at the same time with one or more of the people unaware of what you were doing? Yes [ ] No [ ] 86. Gone steady with two or more people at the same time with all of them knowing that you were doing it? Yes [ ] No [ ] 87. Urinated on someone else intentionally? (Piss fights!) Yes [ ] No [ ] 88. Urinated in cup, bottle, pitcher or any such receptacle that was not originally designed for such purpose excepting urinalysis incidents? Yes [ ] No [ ] 89. Urinated anywhere other than a bathroom, outhouse, tree, bush or any commonly accepted piss hole? (For instance: in the kitchen sink, or in the family car's glove compartment.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 90. Urinated from an altitude of more than 20 feet above ground level? (Ski lift, Sears Tower, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 91. Defecated anywhere other than a bathroom, outhouse or any commonly accepted location? (Camping/hiking trips do not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 92. Stored any excretion in your refrigerator, oven, or any food storage or preparation appliance? Yes [ ] No [ ] 93. Stored evacuated excretion anywhere else in your room, apartment, house, habitation, office, etc? Yes [ ] No [ ] 94. Entered a bathroom of the opposite sex and was not ac- companied by someone of the opposite sex and was not involved in a search and/or rescue mission at the time? Yes [ ] No [ ] 95. Mooned or goosed (opposite of mooned; frontal exposure) someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 96. Streaked, flashed, or otherwise exposed yourself in pub- lic before (or after) an informal, unofficial gathering of people? Yes [ ] No [ ] 97. Streaked, flashed, or otherwise exposed yourself in pub- lic before a formal (official) gathering of people? (Such as a session of Congress, stage performance, charity dinner, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 98. Been arrested? (Picture taken and all that wonderful, free stuff.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 99. Received money or some favor to have sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 100. Given money or some favor to have sex, oral sex, or mu- tual masturbation? (Other than yourself.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 101. Thought you might be or might have unintentionally caused someone to be pregnant? Yes [ ] No [ ] 102. Had or gave someone an unwanted pregnancy? Yes [ ] No [ ] 103. Had sex while either you or your partner but not both were under the age of consent of the state that you were in then? Yes [ ] No [ ] 104. Given a sympathy fuck? Yes [ ] No [ ] 105. Initiated sex with someone only for the sake of sex? (You know a better reason?) Yes [ ] No [ ] 106. Willingly committed incest? Yes [ ] No [ ] 107. Been involved in adultery? (Not sex with an adult, ei- ther.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 108. Stolen the underwear of someone you know for a purpose other than that of a practical joke? Yes [ ] No [ ] 109. Intentionally taken someone's underwear and didn't know who it belonged to? (If this was on a date, you're in trouble.) Yes [ ] No [ ] Drugs and Alcohol Have you ever done any of the following: 110. Had an alcoholic drink? Yes [ ] No [ ] 111. Been intoxicated? Yes [ ] No [ ] 112. Threw-up from too much alcohol? Yes [ ] No [ ] 113. Passed out due to excessive alcohol? Yes [ ] No [ ] 114. Forgotten events that occurred while you were drunk? Yes [ ] No [ ] 115. Smoked tobacco? Yes [ ] No [ ] 116. Chewed tobacco? Yes [ ] No [ ] 117. Bought controlled or illicit drugs in violation of the law? Yes [ ] No [ ] 118. Sold or re-sold controlled or illicit substances in violation of the law? Yes [ ] No [ ] 119. Taken stimulants? (Vivarin counts, as do diet pills.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 120. Taken depressants excluding alcohol? Yes [ ] No [ ] 121. Inhaled nitrous oxide (NO2) while not visiting a den- tist? Yes [ ] No [ ] 122. Inhaled anything containing butyl nitrate? Yes [ ] No [ ] 123. Taken valium or any relaxant? Yes [ ] No [ ] 124. Smoked marijuana or sensemilia? Yes [ ] No [ ] 125. Smoked marijuana or sensemilia more than four times? Yes [ ] No [ ] 126. Eaten marijuana or sensemilia? Yes [ ] No [ ] 127. Eaten marijuana or sensemilia more than four times? Yes [ ] No [ ] 128. Taken opiate in any form? (We do not mean the kid on The Andy Griffith Show.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 129. Taken opiate in any form more than twice? Yes [ ] No [ ] 130. Used cocaine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 131. Used cocaine more than four times? Yes [ ] No [ ] 132. Injected any drugs into your body for any other purpose other than medical? Yes [ ] No [ ] 133. Injected any one drug into your body for any purpose other than that of medical more than twice? Yes [ ] No [ ] 134. Taken PCP? Yes [ ] No [ ] 135. Taken PCP more than twice? Yes [ ] No [ ] 136. Taken d-lysergic acid diethylamide (LSD-25), peyote, or psilocybin? Yes [ ] No [ ] 137. Taken LSD, peyote, or psilocybin more than twice? Yes [ ] No [ ] 138. Taken LSD more than six times? Yes [ ] No [ ] 139. Deliberately injured yourself to obtain medication? Yes [ ] No [ ] 140. Played any games in which there was a mystery as to who would be getting drugs and who wouldn't? (Who's Got the Pill, where half the cups of soda would have LSD in them and the other half wouldn't and everybody picks a cup and drinks it and wonders who gets lucky.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 141. Had sex while using cocaine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 142. Had sex while under the influence of marijuana or sensemilia? Yes [ ] No [ ] 143. Had sex while under the influence of LSD, peyote, or psilocybin? Yes [ ] No [ ] Non-Platonic Relationships (Romance and One-Night Stands) For this section, if you are mostly a: - heterosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of the op- posite gender. - homosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of your own gender. - 50-50 confirmed bisexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of the opposite gender. Have you ever: 144. Propositioned someone for necking or petting? Yes [ ] No [ ] 145. Propositioned someone for sex, oral sex, or mutual mas- turbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 146. Pinched or patted someone else's buttocks? Yes [ ] No [ ] 147. French kissed? Yes [ ] No [ ] 148. Been kissed below the neck but not including arms or hands? Yes [ ] No [ ] 149. Kissed someone else below the neck but not including arms or hands? Yes [ ] No [ ] 150. Necked? Yes [ ] No [ ] 151. Petted above the waist? Yes [ ] No [ ] 152. Petted below the waist? Yes [ ] No [ ] 153. Kissed on the first date? Yes [ ] No [ ] 154. Necked on the first date? Yes [ ] No [ ] 155. Petted above the waist on the first date? Yes [ ] No [ ] 156. Petted below the waist on the first date? Yes [ ] No [ ] 157. Given a hickey? Yes [ ] No [ ] 158. Received a hickey? Yes [ ] No [ ] 159. Fondled or stroked someone else's clothed legs? Yes [ ] No [ ] 160. Fondled or stroked someone else's bare legs? Yes [ ] No [ ] 161. Fondled or stroked someone else's frontal chest or torso region? Yes [ ] No [ ] 162. Had your frontal chest or torso region fondled or stroked? Yes [ ] No [ ] 163. Been involved with pelvic thrusting while fully clothed? (Steamy slow dancing counts.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 164. Had your fingers licked or sucked? Yes [ ] No [ ] 165. Licked or sucked someone else's fingers? Yes [ ] No [ ] 166. Had your ear or ear region licked, breathed upon, sucked, or nibbled? Yes [ ] No [ ] 167. Licked, breathed onto, sucked, or nibbled an ear or ear region? Yes [ ] No [ ] 168. Fondled someone who was asleep? Yes [ ] No [ ] 169. Given a back massage with ulterior motives? Yes [ ] No [ ] 170. Given a back massage that lead to something steamier? Yes [ ] No [ ] 171. Seen someone else completely nude and the person was un- der good lighting conditions? Yes [ ] No [ ] 172. Been seen completely nude under good lighting condition by someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] 173. Been in someone's company while both of you were com- pletely nude? Yes [ ] No [ ] 174. Bathed or showered with someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 175. Let someone else wash you while you were perfectly ca- pable of doing it yourself. (This means that it doesn't count if you were in the hospital with two broken arms and the nurse washed you, no matter how cute she is.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 176. Gone skinny dipping in mixed company? Yes [ ] No [ ] 177. Been involved with the stroking or fondling of a woman's clothed breast(s)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 178. Been involved with the stroking or fondling of a woman's bare breast(s)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 179. Licked, sucked, or nibbled on someone else's nipple(s)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 180. Had your nipple(s) licked, sucked, or nibbled upon? Yes [ ] No [ ] 181. Petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled someone else's covered genitals? Yes [ ] No [ ] 182. Had your covered genitals petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled? Yes [ ] No [ ] 183. Petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled someone else's bare genitals? Yes [ ] No [ ] 184. Had your bare genitals petted, stroked, fondled, or oth- erwise handled? Yes [ ] No [ ] 185. Had an orgasm while petting? Yes [ ] No [ ] 186. Given your partner an orgasm while petting? Yes [ ] No [ ] 187. Given or received finger-scratch marks? Yes [ ] No [ ] 188. Performed oral sex? (Bravo.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 189. Received oral sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 190. Done 69? (You must be at least 48 inches tall to be al- lowed on this ride.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 191. Performed mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 192. Had sex? (No need for orgasm; penetration counts.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 193. Had sex on the first date? (Was there a second date?) Yes [ ] No [ ] 194. Had sex without the use of birth control devices? (Rhythm, prayer and hope methods do not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 195. Had sex with a virgin? (Not yourself.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 196. Had sex with a religious officiary? (Priest, nun, rabbi, ayatollah, mother-superior, cardinal, pope, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] Out of The Ordinary for You (Not Your First Choice) This section of the test deals with whether you have done things with people whom you may not be altogether comfort- able, therefore in this section of the test, if you are mostly a: - heterosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of your own gender. - homosexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of the oppo- site gender. - 50-50 confirmed bisexual, then your partner in deed, often referred to by the words someone or partner, is to be someone of your own gender. Have you ever done any of the following: 197. Held hands or otherwise displayed public affection? Yes [ ] No [ ] 198. Kissed someone on the lips? Yes [ ] No [ ] 199. French kissed someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 200. Necked? Yes [ ] No [ ] 201. Petted? Yes [ ] No [ ] 202. Been involved in mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 203. Initiated mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 204. Received oral sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 205. Given oral sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 206. Had sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 207. Had anal sex? (The use of fingers or any phallic objects in this case would also count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 208. Done 69? Yes [ ] No [ ] 209. Propositioned someone for sex, oral sex, or mutual mas- turbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 210. Yielded willingly to a proposition from someone for sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 211. Been a participant in a who's-physically-better-equipped verification contest? (Contestants must be of same gender; spectators, judges, umpires, and verifiers may be of differ- ent gender.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 212. Gave money or favors for sex, oral sex, or mutual mas- turbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 213. Received money or favors for sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 214. Fondled someone who was asleep? Yes [ ] No [ ] 215. Attempted to seduce someone (who was not asleep)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 216. Allowed yourself to be seduced? Yes [ ] No [ ] 217. Had an orgasm while petting? Yes [ ] No [ ] 218. Gave your partner an orgasm while petting? Yes [ ] No [ ] 219. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with more than 10 people? Yes [ ] No [ ] 220. Stroked or fondled the clothed legs of someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 221. Stroked or fondled the bare legs of someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 222. Stroked or fondled the clothed chest or torso region of someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 223. Stroked or fondled the bare chest or torso region of someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 224. Stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled the clothed genitals of someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] 225. Stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled the bare genitals of someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] 226. Been in a menage-a-trois of people of the same sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] Only When Desperate (On a Regular Basis, of Course) For any of the questions in this section, a yes answer is in order if it is something that you do in conjunction with other means of sexual gratification, or in other words, have you done it on a serious basis? Do any of the following apply: 227. Been decidedly heterosexual? Yes [ ] No [ ] 228. Been decidedly homosexual? Yes [ ] No [ ] 229. Been decidedly bisexual? Yes [ ] No [ ] 230. Practiced bestiality (avec les animaux)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 231. Practiced transvesticism? Yes [ ] No [ ] 232. Practiced sadism? (For clarification: a sadist likes to hurt others.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 233. Practiced masochism? (For clarification: a masochist likes to receive pain.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 234. Practiced bondage? Yes [ ] No [ ] 235. Practiced domination? Yes [ ] No [ ] 236. Practiced submission? Yes [ ] No [ ] 237. Practiced sodomy (anal sex)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 238. Practiced coprophilia (the use of feces or filth for sexual excitement)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 239. Practiced frotteurism (masturbation by rubbing against another person)? (Senior prom slow dances may count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 240. Practiced klismaphilia (a dependency on being given an enema)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 241. Practiced necrophilia (fascination with the dead)? (She may have died a virgin, but we're not going to let her be buried as one, now are we?) Yes [ ] No [ ] 242. Practice mysophilia (a dependency on something soiled or filthy, such as sweaty underwear or used menstrual pads)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 243. Practice scoptophilia (a desire to look at sexually stimulating scenes)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 244. Practiced urophilia (being dependently responsive to the smell or taste of urine or the sight and sound of someone urinating)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 245. Owned an underwear collection of underwear not belonging to you? Yes [ ] No [ ] 246. Been a foot fetishist to any degree? Yes [ ] No [ ] 247. Been a voyeur (Peeping Tom)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 248. Been an exhibitionist? Yes [ ] No [ ] The Simple Things (Lose These Points as You Play!) This section relates to what you have or have not done. Ac- cordingly, the people we are speaking of are of both genders. In questions where groups are concerned, there must be at least one person in the group who is of the opposite gender. Have you ever done any of the following: 249. Listened to dirty jokes in mixed company? Yes [ ] No [ ] 250. Told dirty jokes in mixed company? Yes [ ] No [ ] 251. Discussed masturbation? (Bringing up the topic of mas- turbation during Purity Testing does not cut it as discussed masturbation, unless the conversation lasts ten minutes or more.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 252. Played a game in which it may require you or others to disrobe? Yes [ ] No [ ] 253. Played a game in which it may require you or others to perform an action on another participant? Yes [ ] No [ ] 254. Been in intimate contact with more than one person at the same time while all of you were nude? Yes [ ] No [ ] 255. Had sex with more than 10 people? Yes [ ] No [ ] 256. Had sex with more than one person in a 24 hour period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 257. Had sex with both genders in a 24 hour period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 258. Been in a bisexual or heterosexual menage-a-trois? Do NOT attempt this if you have a heart condition, or have a history of cardiac failures. Yes [ ] No [ ] 259. Had sex or oral sex with a person and his or her parent? Yes [ ] No [ ] 260. Had sex, oral sex, mutual masturbation, necking, or pet- ting with a person and his or her sibling? Yes [ ] No [ ] 261. Been involved in a two (or more) in one? Yes [ ] No [ ] 262. Been involved in a gang bang? (Step right up; come and get it while it's hot. Two or more people masturbating does count, if you're participating at the time. Male or female.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 263. Been in a circle of fuck? Yes [ ] No [ ] 264. Been in a 69 circle? Yes [ ] No [ ] 265. Been to a cooking, baby, Quaker State, or Wesson oil party? Yes [ ] No [ ] 266. Participated in a heterosexual orgy or been involved in group sex? (Four people or more; partners must be exchanged.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 267. Participated in a bisexual orgy or group sex? (Four people or more; partners must be exchanged.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 268. Participated in a fuckathon? (Where the object is to see how many times you can do it in a given amount of time. This is an extremely dangerous activity. The people who perform this feat are highly trained athletes. Pledge sheets can be obtained at 7-11.) Yes [ ] No [ ] Kinkiness (And Perversion) This section measures your kinkiness. Therefore, the ques- tions apply to both actions and events occurring while you were alone as well as when you were with someone else. Have you ever done any of the following: 269. Used a bowling pin, Coke bottle, or something along those general shapes for masturbatory or sexual purposes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 270. Masturbated using the aid of food? (Cucumbers, stuffed turkey, Ceasar salad, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 271. Eaten the food used in masturbation after masturbating? Yes [ ] No [ ] 272. Eaten a lab dissection? (Non-human, we hope.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 273. Inserted food into yours or someone else's anus? (Obvi- ously not including a stuffed turkey.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 274. Eaten the food after it was extracted from your or some- one else's anus? Yes [ ] No [ ] 275. Received an enema for a purpose other than medical? Yes [ ] No [ ] 276. Used a basket, garbage can, or any other comparable sized receptacle for target practice masturbating? (No points for distance or accuracy.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 277. Used a mechanical hand-held device in masturbation? (Vi- brator, massager, Dust-Buster, Mr. Coffee, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 278. Used a feather or any other tickling device for the pur- pose of tickling? Yes [ ] No [ ] 279. Used ice for sexual purposes? (Not sex with ice.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 280. Used whipped cream for sexual purposes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 281. Used hot or melted wax for sexual purposes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 282. Put food, gravy, syrup, salad dressing, candy, peanut butter, honey or anything else edible on your partner's body and then eaten it? Yes [ ] No [ ] 283. Used any household syrup, sandwich spreading, oil, salad dressing, or any like substances for sexual purposes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 284. Used ropes, chains, cuffs or any other such device for bondage purposes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 285. Used a whip, chain, cat-o-nine-tails, or something similar for pain? Yes [ ] No [ ] 286. Worn a leather or gore suit? Yes [ ] No [ ] 287. Used an inflatable doll? Yes [ ] No [ ] 288. Humped an inanimate object like a pillow, steak, hole in the wall, sausages, bananas, etc? Yes [ ] No [ ] 289. Had sex or oral sex with a dead person? Yes [ ] No [ ] 290. Inserted a small animal or creature into your anus? (Ei- ther alive or dead.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 291. Had sex, or oral sex with your dinner animal or crea- ture? Yes [ ] No [ ] 292. Attempted to have sex, oral sex, or masturbation with a live animal, but failed? Yes [ ] No [ ] 293. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with a small- ish animal? (Dogs, cats, rabbits, lab rats, gerbils, etc. Duct tape not included.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 294. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with a wild animal? (Tigers, elephants, cougars, snakes, aardvarks, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 295. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with a farm animal? (Cow, pig, chicken, sheep, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 296. Mutilated any living animal or creature for your plea- sures? (Pulling the wings off of a fly counts.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 297. Had sex with a live animal? (Any size.) Yes [ ] No [ ] The following three questions differ from those above in that ones above measure your variation in animal choice, and the questions down here measure what you do with the animals. 298. Received oral sex from a live animal? (Any size.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 299. Gave oral sex to a live animal? (Any size.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 300. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with a single type animal more than once? (Alive or dead.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 301. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with more than one kind of animal? (Alive or dead.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 302. Cross dressed in the undergarments of the opposite sex for a sexual purpose? (This means that school plays, ini- tiations, and the like don't count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 303. Stuffed your pants or bra while you were cross-dressed for your sexual purpose? Yes [ ] No [ ] 304. Had your head inserted into a urinal or toilet bowl willingly? (Doing this in a pristine, show-room model does not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 305. Worn groinal underwear on your head? (Panties, jock-strap, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 306. Eaten, sucked, licked, nibbled, or otherwise inserted unwashed, used groinal underwear into your mouth while the underwear was not being worn at the time? Yes [ ] No [ ] 307. Deliberately sniffed or smelled the unwashed, used un- derwear while it was not being worn at the time? Yes [ ] No [ ] 308. Played in or with feces? (Yuck.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 309. Worn or used a condom, or any feminine hygiene contrap- tion that has already been used by someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] Locality (Some People Do Things Anywhere) This section tries to figure out how many places you have done it. It applies only to those situations in which you were with someone else. Have you ever done any of the following: 310. Necked or petted in a place of religion? (Church, temple, altar, Grand Holy Cabbage Head Patch, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 311. Had sex, been involved in oral sex or mutual masturba- tion in a place of religion? Yes [ ] No [ ] 312. Had sex, been involved in oral sex or mutual masturbation in a place of the dead? (Morgue, mortuary, cem- etery, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 313. Necked or petted in a place of the dead? (Barstow, Ca- lif., does not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 314. Had sex, been involved in oral sex, or mutual masturba- tion in a contraption of the dead? (Coffin, hearse, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 315. Necked or petted in a contraption of the dead? Yes [ ] No [ ] 317. Necked or petted in a car, station wagon, van, minivan, minibus, fuckmobile, or any moderately sized, land-road based vehicle not in excess of 30,000? Yes [ ] No [ ] 316. Had sex, been involved in oral sex or mutual masturba- tion in a car, station wagon, van, minivan or any moderately sized, land-road based vehicle? Yes [ ] No [ ] 318. Had sex, been involved in oral sex or mutual masturba- tion in a tank, truck, armored car, or any land-road based vehicle in excess of 30,000 pounds? Yes [ ] No [ ] 319. Necked or petted in a land-road based vehicle in excess of 30,000 pounds net unladen gross weight? Yes [ ] No [ ] 320. Had sex been involved in oral sex or mutual masturbation in a land based, non road dependant vehicle? (Train, subway, roller-coaster, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 321. Had sex, participated in oral sex, participated in mu- tual masturbation, necked, or petted in a water based, ve- hicular transport medium locomoted by manual power? (Row boat, surfboard, floating bathtub, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 322. Had sex, participated in oral sex, participated in mu- tual masturbation, necked, or petted in a water based, wind or propeller driven transport medium not in excess of 80 feet? (Yacht, PT boat, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 323. Had sex, participated in oral sex, participated in mu- tual masturbation, necked, or petted in a water based, wind or propeller driven transport medium that is in excess of 80 feet? (Ship, battleship, aircraft carrier, nuclear submarine, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 324. Had sex, participated in oral sex, participated in mu- tual masturbation, necked, or petted in an aircraft? (Air- plane, helicopter, hovercraft, balloon, zeppelin, flying carpet, flying saucer, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 325. Had sex in a household room other than a bedroom? Yes [ ] No [ ] 326. Had sex on the floor (but not the roof)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 327. Had sex on any furniture that is indoors but is not a bed, table, desk, counter-top, nor anything that is pre- dominantly used for sitting, or to be used as a table or desk? Yes [ ] No [ ] 328. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation in a telephone booth, voting booth, auto- matic photograph takers, or any such small, non-moving en- closure that was not designed for such activities? Yes [ ] No [ ] 329. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation in an elevator, people-mover, escalator, or any building internal people moving device? Yes [ ] No [ ] 330. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation up a tree but not in a tree house or similar structure? Yes [ ] No [ ] 331. Had sex participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation on a roof of a building in excess of 5 floors? Yes [ ] No [ ] 332. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation inside or within the confines of a hedge, bush, other natural vegetation which can provide a wall ef- fect, cave, rock overhang, in a well, or any other secluded, outdoor, non-vegetative shielding structure? Yes [ ] No [ ] 333. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in the snow? (Spring thaw acceptable.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 334. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in a place where the prevailing, ambient temperature (of the air immedi- ately surrounding you) was below the freezing point of wa- ter? Yes [ ] No [ ] 335. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in mutual masturbation in a place where you could have been dis- covered? Yes [ ] No [ ] 336. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in a water-filled bath-tub, hot tub, under a shower, running water (as in waterfalls, tropical, torrential downpour, monsoons, etc.)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 337. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in a body of water? (swimming pool, swimming hole, pond, lake, lagoon, sea, ocean, etc) Yes [ ] No [ ] 338. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in a bathroom of the opposite sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] Style and Form Have you ever done any of the following: 339. Watched while someone else masturbated? Yes [ ] No [ ] 340. Orgasmed on somebody? Yes [ ] No [ ] 341. Orgasmed in somebody if you are a male or had someone orgasm in you if you are a female? Yes [ ] No [ ] 342. Been involved in the use of a penis as a bludgeoning de- vice? Yes [ ] No [ ] 343. Been involved in oxygen deprivation for sexual enhance- ment? (Nitrous oxide does not count.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 344. Willingly made video tapes or had pictures taken while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 345. Willingly made audio recordings while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 346. Talked dirty while having sex, oral sex, or mutual mas- turbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 347. Intentionally made more noise than necessary while hav- ing sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation so as to put on a good show for whoever may be listening in? (Friends, par- ents, the FBI, etc.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 348. Had a family pet or domesticated animal walk over you or your partner during sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 349. Had a general emergency arise while you were steeped in sex? (Such as: house on fire, flash flood, private plane crash-lands in your dwelling...) Yes [ ] No [ ] 350. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone in which there is an age difference of more than 10 years? Yes [ ] No [ ] 351. Taken nude pictures of someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] 352. Had nude pictures of you taken? Yes [ ] No [ ] 353. Been involved in breast fucking? Yes [ ] No [ ] 354. Participated in fist-fucking? Yes [ ] No [ ] 355. Had sex for more than three hours in a single session of sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 356. Been bruised during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturba- tion? Yes [ ] No [ ] 357. Bruised someone else during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 358. Been injured during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturba- tion? Yes [ ] No [ ] 359. Orgasmed more the three times in one session of sex, oral sex or mutual masturbation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 360. Disturbed other people with excessive noise while you and your partner were having sex, oral sex, or mutual mastur- bation? Yes [ ] No [ ] 361. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation while you were driving (the car or boat or whatever vehicle)? Yes [ ] No [ ] 362. Had sex doggie fashion? Yes [ ] No [ ] 363. Had sex in the female superior position? Yes [ ] No [ ] 364. Had sex sitting up? Yes [ ] No [ ] 365. Had sex standing up? Yes [ ] No [ ] 366. Had sex upside-down? Yes [ ] No [ ] 367. Gone through two or more sexual positions without the need for re-entry? Yes [ ] No [ ] 368. Fell asleep during sex? ("Was it good for you? Hello?") Yes [ ] No [ ] 369. Woken up to someone having sex with you? Yes [ ] No [ ] 370. Given or received a hickey on your upper, inner thigh? Yes [ ] No [ ] 371. Been on the receiving of anal sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 372. Been on the ramming end of anal sex? Yes [ ] No [ ] 373. Had sex more than 10 times with the same person? Yes [ ] No [ ] 374. Had sex more than 5 times in a 24 hour period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 375. Had sex more than 10 times in a 24 hour period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 376. Had sex, participated in oral sex, or participated in masturbation while someone other than your partner was watch- ing? Yes [ ] No [ ] 377. Had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation while one or both of you were playing a musical instrument, hacked, watched television, read, drawn or in other words were preoccupied with something other than sex and lust? Yes [ ] No [ ] 378. Performed oral sex after intercourse without washing or douching? Yes [ ] No [ ] 379. Kissed your partner on the lips after oral sex without the brushing of teeth, or washing/gargling/rinsing out mouth? Yes [ ] No [ ] 380. Inflicted pain during sex? ("Rip me, thrash me, beat me, eat me.") Yes [ ] No [ ] 381. Drawn blood by biting during sex? (Hickeys do not count as having drawn blood.) Yes [ ] No [ ] 382. Been involved in cunnilingus (vaginal oral sex) during the woman's period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 383. Had sex during the woman's period? Yes [ ] No [ ] 384. Foot masturbated someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 385. Been foot masturbated? Yes [ ] No [ ] 386. Tongue bathed someone? Yes [ ] No [ ] 387. Been tongue bathed? Yes [ ] No [ ] 388. Licked or sucked on someone else's feet and/or toes? Yes [ ] No [ ] 389. Had your feet and/or toes licked or sucked by someone else? Yes [ ] No [ ] 390. Licked someone's anus? Yes [ ] No [ ] 391. Licked someone's anus while they were defecating? Yes [ ] No [ ] 392. Performed oral sex while the person was urinating? Yes [ ] No [ ] 393. Drank your own urine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 394. Tasted or drank someone else's urine? Yes [ ] No [ ] 395. Drank human blood? Yes [ ] No [ ] 396. Tasted someone else's nasal mucous? Yes [ ] No [ ] 397. Been involved in golden showers? Yes [ ] No [ ] 398. Swallowed your partner's orgasmic secretions? Yes [ ] No [ ] 399. Used the Purity Test as a checklist of things you could do? Yes [ ] No [ ] 400. Participated in Purity Testing with an ulterior motive? Yes [ ] No [ ] Scoring Sworn to excellence of workmanship, we now give you direc- tions on how to calculate your Purity score. There are sev- eral methods; the calculator method works best. Count your "NO" answers, then divide this number by four. This gives your percentage purity; the higher the number, the more pure you are; in the same vein, the lower the score, the more of a sleaze-bag you are. For your reference, we include calcula- tor directions: For people with real calculators (HP): <#no ans.> ENTER 4 / For people with other (dinky) calculators: <#no ans.> / 4 = __________________ Purity Index Table __________________ Note: You can score as low as 15 percent pure and still be a virgin. However, we highly doubt a person scoring under 50 percent is still as pure as the driven snow... but we could be wrong. 100 - 90 You're about as close to sainthood as possible. You may want to consider having fun occasionally - It'll do you good. 80 - 89 Not bad. Parents trust you, but you still know how to have a decent time on a date. 70 - 79 Mothers raise eyebrows when they meet you, but they still let you date their "child." If you're Catholic, you may want to go to confession, but there's no need to run. 60 - 69 We are approaching kinky here. A lot of people may want to leave the party with you. Anyone who get's a "D" on the Purity Test really knows how to party. Just be careful. 50 - 59 Perversion can be fun; we just hope you aren't some kind of sicko. You may be earning a reputation. If you lose any more purity points you'll never be welcomed by parents. Below 50 You've done some pretty strange things, huh? Warranty Information We hope that you have enjoyed this test. It does not come with a warranty, nor does it guarantee that it will get you laid or make you somehow somewhat better in bed or the hay- stack. The makers of this test are not responsible for any liabilities or damages resulting from this test, including but not limited to, paternity suits. Ask your doctor or phar- macist. Do not take apart; there are no user serviceable parts inside. Propagate (this test) at will, even without the written permission of the publisher; just don't edit or change it. In reproducing this test, the authors of this test may exercise droit de seigneur over you, your immediate fam- ily, or fiance(e). You may or may not have additional rights which may vary from state to state. (i.e. inebriated) Not recommended for children under twelve. Parental guidance discouraged and frowned upon. Pencils, additional paper, and batteries not included. Some assembly may be required. Does not come with any other figures. Drive carefully; 90% of the people in the world are caused by accidents. The above is a public service announcement of this institu- tion. ------------------------------CUT HERE---------------------------------